Thoughts...

I have a lot on my mind right now, so I thought I would just write. The majority of my posts are filled with pictures and fun stuff going on. This week has been really rough. Anderson started throwing up around midnight Monday, and it has lingered on all week. And of course the worst always happens in the middle of the night when I can't talk to a doctor and get some sort of answer. Sure I've called and talked to nurses, but that just doesn't seem to help comfort me. I need something that will "fix" Anderson - make him all better and back to normal. That's the kind of person I am. I want to make everything OK for the people I love. And I think I have control over things, when in reality I have absolutely no control over some things. Only God does. This has been a week that God has really made me realize this. It's like I know that I am like this, but I just have a really hard time letting go and giving things to Him. And this week He has really taught me that I have no control, and the only thing I can do is leave it to Him and trust that He will take care of my baby. Last night (in the middle of the night), all I could do was turn to God. We thought Anderson was getting over this bug, but around midnight he threw up again - twice. As he was lying in our bed next to us, all I could do was just pray. Pray that God would heal him and make him feel better. And at that point, I knew that was all I could do. Pray. And trust that God would take care of him. I called and talked to a nurse, but that wasn't what I really needed. I needed to spend time with Him and try to give my worries over to Him. Before I had Anderson, I could never even imagine the love I would have for him. It's nothing anyone could ever describe. I would do absolutely anything for him. Let me be the sick one and not him. God helped me get through the night and now I continue to pray that He will heal Anderson and make him all better. He is definitely better than he was earlier in the week, but things have just lingered on a lot longer than I thought they would. We went back to the doctor again today, so I just pray that the medicine we got will help heal his little stomach. I think the hardest part is that Anderson has always been so healthy, and now within two weeks, he's had a double ear infection and now this stomach bug. It's been VERY hard, but it has also brought me closer to the Lord. So I will keep praying and working on trusting Him completely. So I ask that you will pray for Anderson and me as we get through this. :)